“By relinquishing normal patterns of human striving and hard work, we can become aware of the vacuum we keep trying to fill by doing stuff and achieving things.” – Dallas Willard
Have you ever found yourself striving to get things done no matter the cost? I have. I was raised with a strong work ethic. If something is worth doing, it is worth doing right was my dad’s motto! So it didn’t surprise me that I became a “get it done kind of person.” I will work tirelessly until I finish something.
In 2014, I had just celebrated my tenth year on staff at the church where I worked. I was blessed with a 3 month sabbatical. It took me a couple of weeks of working through my to do lists before I realized what God really wanted from me. He wanted me to stop the striving and start abiding.
I started slowing down and spending time with Jesus. My morning quiet time became my favorite time of my day. I no longer wanted to hurry through my devotions to get on to the next thing on my list. I started lingering in the Word. I started journaling. I learned that Jesus wanted me to learn to be with Him. He showed me what it was to abide in Him. This sabbatical provided the much needed space to rest and to restore my spiritual health.
A Slip Back into Striving
Recently, I found myself back in a striving mode. I was on staff at a large multi-site church. We were getting ready to launch a new campus. There was a lot to do. I had a to-do list a mile long. I could tell my soul was quickly becoming weary. I became full of anxiety and worry that I wasn’t going to be able to keep up. Did I mention I was a perfectionist who valued excellence! Ugh…
Over time, as I spent time in God’s Word and in prayer, Jesus reminded me of what he called me to do.. Abide in Him.
“Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing. Anyone who does not remain in me is thrown away like a useless branch and withers. Such branches are gathered into a pile to be burned. But if you remain in me and my words remain in you, you may ask for anything you want, and it will be granted! When you produce much fruit, you are my true disciples. This brings great glory to my Father.” John 5-8
I stepped away from that role 2 months ago. My anxiety has subsided. My soul is being restored as I am finding rest in abiding. I am spending intentional time with Jesus. I am choosing His presence. A book that has helped me re-focus is Choosing Presence: How to Access God’s Peace and Release Fear, Anxiety and Stress by Jim Heaney.
I think Dallas was right. We have to relinquish the pattern of human striving and hard work if we are going to abide in Jesus. What about you, are you striving or abiding?
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